Hint: it’s a film all about reinvention, rebirth but also the dynamics of control.

At the center of Yorgos Lanthimos’ latest, starring his frequent collaborators Emma Stone and Willem Dafoe — as well as his friend Yorgos Stefanakos as R.M.F., the only character who appears in all three segments of the film — there are themes that are, well, otherworldly. Kinds of Kindness is framed by the idea of cult-followers and leaders, being the lover vs. being the lovee, the controller and the controlled. And how much our impression on others is important — both to ourselves and to those doing the observing.

Even the song which kicks off the opening of the film, Eurythmics’ ‘Sweet Dreams’ hints at what is to come.

Divided in three segments, each comes with its own insight, aesthetic and lesson, courtesy of Lanthimos and co-writer Efthimis Filippou, another frequent collaborator of the filmmaker. In part one, “The Death of R.M.F.” Robert (played by Jesse Plemons) wants to please Raymond (Dafoe), who commands him to kill R.M.F., a willing participant to the scheme, by car crash. As Robert’s first attempt fails, he’s left to wonder if it is more important to maintain the status quo of his life and follow Raymond’s irrational orders, or be free — yet also jobless, loveless, life less basically. What would you choose, the film seems to ask?

In “R.M.F. is Flying” Liz (Stone) plays a researcher who has disappeared at sea and her cop husband Daniel (Plemons) is seemingly having a hard time going on with his life. When she is found and returns to the marriage, Daniel claims this is not his wife Liz, rather some stranger. Something is different about her. Her shoes don’t fit her and she eats chocolate cake, which she previously despised. But how much of this is actually Daniel’s paranoia, which he is under medication for, and how much is reality? The “new” Liz is now a woman with a strong will of her own and Daniel, probably used to the time he had alone, wants her to submit to his will, not take control of the marriage. She instead wants sex when she wants it, how she wants it and talks out of turn. He gives her impossible tasks and without blinking, she follows them — Liz also wanting to bring back the status quo of the marriage, no doubt. Without giving anything away, the ending of this segment is about finally getting the mate you wanted. Even if she/he is just a dream.

In “R.M.F. Eats a Sandwich” Emily and Andrew (Stone and Plemons) are cult followers, complete with drab colored suits and sandals, while Omi and Aka (Dafoe and Hong Chau) are the cult’s leader and his wife, respectively. Their tears feed the soul of their followers who would do just about anything to bring them the chosen one — a woman who fits a certain, very precise description and has yet to be found. The theme of controller and the controlled and how interdependent these two beings are with each other is at its most obvious in this segment, which ends with R.M.F. — mid-credits — you guessed it, eating a sandwich. His is the only character who remains the same and threads through the film, and burger joint Baby Snack Box, where he eats, is the only New Orleans landmark we see in the film — though Kinds of Kindness in its entirety was filmed in Louisiana.

So what is my hack for watching Kinds of Kindness? Apart from obvious tips to enjoy the film, which include avoiding liquids pre and during the screening and maybe visiting the bathroom right before it starts — the film is nearly 3 hours long — I would say sit back and relax. Enjoy the ride. But don’t forget to pay attention to your own shifting viewpoint, as Lanthimos manages to change your allegiances every ten minutes and also helps to explain our modern culture — filled with a need to belong. Most of what is in Kinds of Kindness could be applied to social media, where people spew out knowledge they do not possess to their millions of followers and ask complete strangers to follow their lead. Even at the risk of injuring themselves. Or worse.

But also remember that reincarnation, re-birth, the power of faith and the need to control and be controlled are important threads in the film and the Greek genius, whose work I don’t always love but will defend with my life, once again made me reexamine my own existence and personal philosophy, from the comfort of a plush cinema seat.

Another hack— make sure to watch the film in a cinema. Sitting at home in front of your TV won’t bring out the magic in the way Kinds of Kindness is filmed. Trust me. The film, which world premiered at this year’s Cannes Film Festival, is in cinemas now.

I’ll leave you with this quote I loved by Lanthimos, in the press kit for the film: “Sometimes you just need to be ridiculous in order to achieve what we’re trying to achieve.” It proves that at the core of this film filled with absurd situations and unbelievable results, there is a lesson to be learned. If you just pay attention to your heart.

All images used with permission.